Tag Archives: love

Love is disarming

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When the Earth hurts, I can feel it. A dead animal on the side of the road once breathed the same air and molecules that I also have. In this way, we are all a very interwoven part of each other. So when things happen that seem incomprehensible, disturbing, tragic, and full of hate, I hurt on deep levels, and wonder how we can share the same breath of life, and yet be so vastly different all in one. 

I sit remotely in my room and try to think of reasons why someone does something that feels so full of hate. I also observe the reaction of such turbulence, confusion, and deep despair. So to find some understanding, I head to my books. 

One tells me, ” If you allow negativity to come up, face it head on with love, you will disarm it. The ego will lose power.” 

I think to myself, we must only react with love. Much easier to type, than to say, and much easier to say, than to do. We are angry ourselves. We are shocked. We are saddened. And we will FIGHT BACK we say… but instead, can we bring love to the battleground? 

Enough of the justice will be served with an underlying tone revenge… the revenge to hate is love. The revenge to madness is love. to jealousy? love. to all conflict? love.

And as my book finishes so eloquently, ” There is no political solution, religion, world diet, or business plan that is going to pacify conflicts in one fell swoop. The world’s problems are your problems. What can you do toward world peace? Find out who you really are. Be the change you want to see. ” Lets all be love.

(quotes from Happy Yoga)

Heart

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Recently I wrote and had lots of questions about what it means to love and be in love. And last night, speaking to a dear friend of mine, we got into the conversation of relationships… and in the conversation some ideas blossomed that I feel compelled to share.

As you grow up, you have a picture in your head of what your mate will be like. It may be phsyical, or the career path he/she will lead, perhaps some key character traits… and eventually this template, this mold, this… limited thought is created. It’s limited because now you have made something that someone can’t and shouldn’t fit. It’s limited because it’s only a small part of the experience of being in a relationship. It’s limited because it’s already making a decision without ever asking your heart.

Your heart and head aren’t always on the same page… and what you’ll find is your heart is always right, but your head works hard to challenge it.

I am wonderfully appreciative of the person in my life that doesn’t fit the mold. I see him as someone that has taught me this incredibly important lesson. My heart knows that he is gentle, and authentic. He is caring, and sensitive. He is stubborn and still willing to grow. He is imaginative and thorough. He is handsome and witty. He is real and always changing. This isn’t in my head, this is the feeling in my heart. See? It’s different.

When people say “I knew he/she was the one as soon as I met him/her,” to me it says you let your head lead and not your heart. Because what you find out in your heart comes from unraveling this dynamic and complex person. It takes time and experience. It never stops being exciting because this person experiments with life’s challenges and seeks growth.

Find appreciation for the time spent with this person. The moments collect. Some incredible, heart-racing, relaxed, unsure, scary, beautiful, difficult moments all come together and challenge your mind back. Your heart will win if you let it.

See your partner from your heart. See your friends from your heart. See your family from your heart. Live your life from the heart. Don’t make a decision in your mind. It’s a ploy, it’s a detour, it’s a cycle of analytical and ration. Oh Dear, your heart is much more exciting than that.

Pass love on

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The holiday season we are reminded of the gift of giving. Many will volunteer time to help with those who are less fortunate, be it serving a meal or delivering goods. And when the experience is completed we will say, gosh I would like to do that more often because it feels so good but sadly many of us will remind ourselves a year later when we do our annual giving once again.

Giving doesn’t have to be so big. Giving can be simple. And I encourage all to give not just over the next few weeks, but throughout the year.

Look around. Everyone is desperately seeking love. Love can be a smile. It can be a wink or a hello. It can be a paid check or a note.. Remind each other that there is love to spread.

I can promise you that it is contagious. Giving love means more love for all. It begins so simply and then it multiplies… Like a growing epidemic of love. Doesn’t it sound amazing?

As you travel for your holidays, keep your eyes open for places and people who really need love. And send it their way. They feel it; they appreciate it, and they will pass it forward.

Happy day of thanks and giving.

I am you

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The last few days for anyone on the East Coast has been in the least, unpredictable. Gusts of wind, heavy rain for days, and damage that will take quite some time to reconstruct. Being a Clevelander (OH) we lost power, Lake Erie had raging waves and the wind/rain combination felt purposefully powerful.

While meandering about with two days off work, the couple of places I went had conversation of “Can’t believe my power is out,” and “major flooded basements,” and while I was fortunate enough to only lose power for 12 hours, I started to think about the real devastation in other parts of the states.

People stranded in Hoboken with no food, no light, and no way of getting out or getting anything in. New York City’s grocery stores vacant, and empty.. People wandering the streets without homes, without stuff, without purpose. And the grief felt heavy. Can I even imagine? Can I even relate on a smaller scale? Losing power for the night when I rest my eyes in dark anyhow? The compassion is in my heart and my soul hurts for the society of human beings that don’t have a thing to go home to…

I was driving home this afternoon post thought and in front of me was the license plate, “I am you.” And that’s the message we must send. We may not be in Hoboken stranded in the Senior Assisted Living space, and we might not be walking the streets of empty New York with the question of, “What the hell am I even doing?” but that doesn’t mean we can’t send them light and compassion. Our energy, if we come together, is immense. Love is felt through our willingness to bear understanding and feel grief for those who hurt more than us. We are every person in the city, and every animal struggling to find refuge. We are the Governor trying to make the best decision possible, and every city worker trying to restore anything, everything while worrying about loved ones too.

To those who are still mourning the loss of a loved one, a lost animal, a lost home, belongings, identity, understanding of life.. we send you our love. We are you. We can remind you that you are going to be okay, you are love, and you are me.

We will get through this together. Miles apart but with the intensity of a greater storm.. and that storm is the perseverance of love.

The coffee stop

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It has felt like one of those days.

I felt heavy, undervalued, unheard, tired, ready for something different.. And now on my lunch break, I escape my work world for my world of wonder..

I walked into a coffee establishment and was greeted by a man with the sweetest demeanor. He is kind, and quiet. He seemed patient, and reliable. And he walked into my life to serve a coffee, but what he did instead was changed my day, so thank you.

I can look for reasons to feel glum, and I will certainly find them.
I also can find the joy in a stranger and he can help me see good.

Sometimes we don’t ask to see it differently, and until we want it to be different, it will remain the same. So if you’re feeling the way I was, a bit hopeless at moments, maybe desperate, can you open your mind and heart to the option of kindness? For someone to walk into your life that can shake it up and make your perspective change? It will come friend. You are a sweet soul, and you will be okay.