Worry

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Worry and Hopeful.

How do these two words coexist? Well they both take us away from the present moment into the past or future.

We tend to worry about the past. Should I have said it? Could I have done it better? Did I make the right decision?

We tend to hope in future terms. I hope that he calls. I hope that tomorrow is better. I hope that I lose weight by the wedding.

But what really are we doing? Pema Chodron brought up a great point about worry. She says, “If you are worrying about something that is in your control, why are you worrying? If you are worried about something out of your control, why are you worrying?”

Isn’t that the truth? Worry is such a waste of your precious time. And certainly a waste of mine.

Over the weekend I found myself worrying. I slept at my sisters and found myself worrying as I was woken up at 3:20 am to a guy swearing 18 floors below. I worried if he was driving.. I worried if he needed water.. if he was going to be okay. If the cops were going to come.. I worried these things. These worries, in fact, kept me awake for almost an hour.

I had no control of this guy. He made his own decisions if he was going to get behind the wheel.. his decision making abilities may have been.. how do we say this.. skewed… but he had also made a decision to be out until 3 am.. He made decisions and his worry can’t be mine.

Worry takes up our energy. It takes up our momentum and life force. It grabs our optimism and creates a monster. Worry is no use. We all will worry the rest of our lives. Worry is a part of the way our mind works. But try to be more conscious of why you are worrying. What is the point to worry? As Pema says, If it’s something in your control, why worry?.. after all it’s in your control. If it’s something out of your control, why worry? after all.. it is out of your control. Try your best to hold tight to the present moment and its juicy ways. Go about moment by  moment with the reality (which it is) that this is the moment to live fully.

And let go of that worry. Let it all go.

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