We live in a time where we have so many different “jobs.” We are defined in certain contexts and we all can be defined in different categories. For example, my sister works in insurance and we can say that she is a “business” woman. She also enjoys yoga. She is a “yogi” She also likes to try different types of wine. She is a “wine connoisseur” Try and do that with yourself. You are a _____________ and also a ________________. sometimes an _____________. We have all of these different hats we put on.
Quick story, I once had a friend who stepped into my car, and said, “Woah Hal, I thought your car would be cleaner than this.” I felt offended at first. But then I realized that I carry all of my hats with me. Soccer coach, to teacher, to workout goer, to dinner date, to sleepover. I can, at any time, change my tune. And that’s just how my life has been, on the go.
This all has a point, just stick with me.
See, much like our hat world, I have been working on myself over the past few weeks. Reading books, watching documentaries, trying new things, expanding my horizon to allow for growth of another hat of mine, spirituality. But there is a feeling that comes along with identifying, or putting on a new hat. We fear, a little, there is some anxiety involved.
My nervousness stems from the pressure I put on myself to apply what I’ve learned in a real way. See in 7 short days I will be home again. Back to my routine world. It is a beautiful thing. I feel anxiety that my “real” world won’t allow my hat. It will resist this new way of being. I must lean into, as we all must, into the discomfort of it.
I was on the phone with someone I love tonight. I started to get choked up talking about my “new vision” of life. I read him/her an excerpt from the book I’ve been reading and felt some anxiety in his/her response. Will he/she be uncomfortable? Is this even possible to merge my two worlds of reality together?
Of course, I won’t know until I get home but I can say that the person on the phone was comforting. He/She seemed enthusiastic not only for my arrival home but also to challenge himself/herself to explore these ideas.I felt supported. And the anxiety diminished.
We are all wearing different hats. Some are newer, maybe a little uncomfortable at first, too big (it seems) or a different color. But allow those identities to be integral. Maybe the skill you learn with your green hat, is applicable and helpful to solve a problem you have in your beret. You get my drift.
Our hats/identities are constantly shifting, changing, growing, emerging and I encourage you to not worry. Each hat is the perfect one for you in that moment. And at the end of your life, you’ll look back and be glad that you tried each hat on, they kept you growing, questioning, and expanding.
I tried a new hat on this afternoon, I tried on my surfer hat. It was super hard and I am feeling so sore, ha, but Thanks to Dave who wouldn’t let me paddle in after I got eaten by the first wave. I did, drum roll….. stand up on a surf board today. If only for a moment, the moment was surreal.
See, the hat, although uncomfortable, was an experience.
Happy Hat finding to those that I love.