Joyous abandonment

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I want to talks about ruts, you know those times in your life (days, weeks, months ..) where life feels incredibly heavy or difficult. It seems you have gotten hit with everything all at once and you are considering drowning your sorrows, or running for hours, eating the whole sleeve , okay two sleeves, and none of it, not a single coping mechanism makes this rut you’re in any shallower.

Your movement away from this is what actually keeps you there longer. And if you’d like you can continue this pattern of self defeat, spinning in circles of frustration or anger… O you can see this de-railed moment of life as joyous abandonment.

This moment serves as a time for you to let go of old. Old people, old moments, old memories, old clothes, old parts of yourself. You are living in a moment that is asking you, pleading for you, to expose your sores, your hurt, your stuck in a rut mentality, air it out, and move forward with the feeling of gratitude for liberation.

So, you, the one moping and frustrated, the “work sucks” “life sucks” people… Can you shed it? Are you courageous enough to let go of the old and make some room for the new? Gone is the moment to wallow in self pity about things that no longer serve you. Here you are in this world to be alive and free and you are the only thing limiting this from coming into being.

Find your very own joyous abandonment.

Love is disarming

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When the Earth hurts, I can feel it. A dead animal on the side of the road once breathed the same air and molecules that I also have. In this way, we are all a very interwoven part of each other. So when things happen that seem incomprehensible, disturbing, tragic, and full of hate, I hurt on deep levels, and wonder how we can share the same breath of life, and yet be so vastly different all in one. 

I sit remotely in my room and try to think of reasons why someone does something that feels so full of hate. I also observe the reaction of such turbulence, confusion, and deep despair. So to find some understanding, I head to my books. 

One tells me, ” If you allow negativity to come up, face it head on with love, you will disarm it. The ego will lose power.” 

I think to myself, we must only react with love. Much easier to type, than to say, and much easier to say, than to do. We are angry ourselves. We are shocked. We are saddened. And we will FIGHT BACK we say… but instead, can we bring love to the battleground? 

Enough of the justice will be served with an underlying tone revenge… the revenge to hate is love. The revenge to madness is love. to jealousy? love. to all conflict? love.

And as my book finishes so eloquently, ” There is no political solution, religion, world diet, or business plan that is going to pacify conflicts in one fell swoop. The world’s problems are your problems. What can you do toward world peace? Find out who you really are. Be the change you want to see. ” Lets all be love.

(quotes from Happy Yoga)

Joy

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When we approach the end of the life we are living, the most important question is “Was your life full of joy?” And if it was, we applaud you. You collected beautiful and precious moments, or things that made you feel full of basic goodness.

And today can be full of joy if you’ll let it. Joy in a sun, or birds chirping, joy in feeling sleepy and closing your eyes, joy in laughing deeply for good reason or no reason. Drinking too much wine with friends, eating strawberries, getting your coca cola fix, walking, sitting, what is your joy for today?

In order,though, to have joy you must listen deeply because there is a rhythm and a life inside of you, not your mind… It’s deeper. And it is what lets you feel joy.

So be sure you hear clearly, to capture the voice that insists on joy always. Because when you are in your last moments, you will wonder… Was my life full of joy? And that voice inside of you will certainly answer yes.

Be joyful for every reason and no reason. Xxoo

Who you were

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Nostalgia

Brings you back to a place a moment in your life. Whether a time of great joy, or difficulty, sorrow, or excitement… Nostalgia seems to serve as a reminder to live in our moment now.

I came home to grab some clothes for this fresh Spring season and found myself in the storage upstairs. I leafed through old notebooks, pictures, clothing and moments. Each bringing a different feeling back into my body. memories and times..

I don’t believe it’s fair to live in past. Nor is it fair to hold someone else there. We all move along in our lives. But revisiting it at times feel comforting. It feels known, it feels predictable. And so sometimes we get caught in our old ways because they are easy.

When you find yourself there, in a past moment, perhaps a past life, give yourself the freedom to feel those feelings, but then remind yourself of the great beauty you are now. To keep yourself in a place that once was does not serve you. We are evolving beings of great depth. We have endless potential to create more in our lives. Visit your past, love it for what it was, but don’t carry that burden with you forward.

Now can feel light too! Now can feel joyous, challenging, enriching, and full of love. Spring is here. See old layers, appreciate them for their guidance and then let it go.

Pictures, memories, moments, are a beautiful part of who you once WERE. But you ARE even more beautiful today. And tomorrow, and on.

Happy spring!

Make no judgment

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People often say that you hurt the one you love the most. Maybe it’s because we are so very critical of them. We expect them to be the very best version, not to stray, not to falter. I too, am this way. My family and boyfriend are under the largest and clearest microscope.

This is not intended to hurt them or place judgment but it is to make them better people. I want to be clear to myself it is because I know they are wonderful people, and faltering means struggling. I think ultimately I don’t want them hurt, and so in being critical, I place no room for error.. Then they can’t possibly fail. But in doing this, I tend to suck the juiciness of living out of the friendship. I overanalayze. I make what is supposed to be light and easy feel at times, difficult and muddy. So as my previous journal entry explains, I will not wallow. But I will certainly re-steer my ways. So starting today, my conscious effort is placed on allowing people to be themselves with whole hearts. These people are in my life because they are so utterly wonderful, these people are in my life because I am so lucky.

So moving forward, without judgment, without criticism, we carry on in these lives. With pure love. And deep appreciation for being exactly where you are.

Welcome all thought

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This morning I woke up from a dreaming cycle. I decided to listen to the 21 day meditation from Deepak Chopra and try to focus my day. 

I am feeling quite sensitive the past few days. I have cried often and at times couldn’t identify the emotion the tears were bringing to the surface. It felt unsure, confused, and perhaps that’s where I am. And it’s okay. 

The message in the meditation centered around being in your present moment. My mind has been running circles and creating monstrous thoughts. I have tried to suppress these feelings because in society, (according to my thought) they are considered wrong, even mean. But, what if instead when you thought something or drempt something, or felt something that felt “wrong” you embraced it as another thought… Instead of feeling fearful you welcomed it. Instead of labeling it as a “big decision” or feeling the burden of life.. You saw it as a moment you thought differently, and you didn’t react with big movement, or decisively… Instead just unraveled it and let it sit. 

So much of our life we don’t do things, or try, because of the fear. We make something small, big. We make a feeling, a lifetime. And it need not be. 

So when you feel heavy, my darlings, when it feels like your thoughts have taken over your mind, when you have mapped out your life’s journey without living it, stand back. Give it time to be itself. Try to enjoy it. 

And when those thoughts, the ones you’re pushing down and away.. When. They return. Invite them in. Don’t fear them. Embrace them.